Open The Eyes of my Heart

My favourite version of : Open The Eyes of my Heart !

Afternoon Tea & Melba Buffet for Dinner ~ 19.01.2013

Experiencing the splendid, and delicate Afternoon Tea moment with Tika at Sofitel Lounge on the Saturday afternoon had become one of the highlights for the more than the ordinary day. It would be categorized as unique, rare occasion and the impartial : that both ladies were filled with merriment. Pour mon, 2 hours was a little quick. Tika, I would love to have another quality time with you again. Appreciate the moment that we had for the day. Most importantly, thank you Tika, for still want to have this friendship continues.

Followed by this, my partner, Mik had booked a sudden dinner appointmen, not telling me beforehand. A kind of surprise which means afternoon tea had led to another dinner date. And yes, I was ready to go ( and Tika had done a marvelous plait for me , merci ! ). The sashimi never failed and the ambiance was pleasant. Although Langham's Melba has become one of my favourite, as for me, no matter where we have meals together, I always love having meals with him around.

January 2013

"There is a reason God limits our days, to make each one precious " 
- The Time Keeper by Mitch Albom -

 "And whatsover ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him." - Colossians 3:17

Monday to Friday, each day to face with the awareness that my knowledge and experiences are limited, draws me to remember to rely on His strength quietly, in a simple and private manner. To remember, this job is entrusted and I want to keep this attitude going. To work, to serve, to love.  

Meeting lots of people, especially my new colleagues somehow made me wonder and observe, in a way I never did before. Many times, my mind tried to decipher the causes of words and behavior that sprang from them. Be patient, to do the possible best and put oneself in others shoes, and to listen ; these are the lessons to heed each day.

My family and home have becoming more important in a degree better than previously ever. Even though it would never be perfect and changes are admittedly very difficult. At least, to love would mean to be nice, to do chores in a way to serve and help and not to fight back. Knowing that one day, I will leave this house, made me appreciate it better.

" To love every note " - quoted by the Tamar Smolyar, the head of Music Department from Monash University, made me remember each time whenever I have the chance to practice during limited time sphere that I have. Somehow, I refuse to let go and determine to embrace the fact that that I am still a musician. Indeed, practice is the only sole path to achieve.

Human relations, perhaps, is the most complicated and difficult to attain. Some friends, come and go, some of them still take part in you. Some long acquaintances request for rendevous, unfortunately I failed them sometimes. Some, however, still maintain good relations and I'm thankful for whoever I have now and I would remember to cherish them as best as I could. And some, though they are distant away or for certain reasons, almost never being able to spend time with me anymore, yet inside my heart, no matter what, they are still my friends that I love.

In a very personal way that is unexplainable, I love, not because he loves me. But, I have fallen in love deeper each day.

7 and a 1/2 month of relationship, has continued to mature. I do learn, not only who my partner really is in a deeper way, I have been discovering more about my own self as well. Though many challenges ahead and routes are never as smooth as we wish, there's a beauty to face things together. And in this month, it is special, to purchase and owe something for the first time together, to commit and to make steps for other things to come. Although sometimes, whys and hows occupied our head, the constant reminder of " having faith " keeps us both going and we are never alone. For He watches us and may 2013 be a better year for us.

Lastly, When I saw my checklist that I wrote without expecting the fulfillment back in March 2012 this morning, I simply get amazed on how some of the wishes have come true in an unexpected way. This also proves on how much He cares and dares to trust me with things that I am too afraid to make a step.Does this reflect the beginning of entering the next level ? I know not the answer. I deny not that I often failed, slipped and fell, unable to overcome my weaknesses and flesh many times, fighting fears and struggling with inner self. I admit that I am not that good. Yes, still sin and no better than anyone else. I also know that, I don't deserve this and that but.. despite of this, I am still loved by Him. God never leave me and still accept me and care for me.

Grateful for today's Words that remind me that the way to please Him is " HAVE FAITH "

Thank you for January 2013.

On the 29th December of 2012..

A very personal day..I should say.. Not feeling very well since days before, I decided not to plan anything and let the day came as it would be.. as natural as it should be.. 

My family were not around for the day , yet a brief meeting with them in the morning before they left for travel was pleasant..

Now I am 28.... in 2012.. many things have passed through.. all the goods and the not-so..throughout the year. But knowing that it's all part of the growing process. I continue to learn.

As for my birthday,the only and only company that I have for the day is my partner, my boyfriend...who put so much effort to make it as best as it could be..

Despite the busy days , the tired working hours, and other personal agenda.., I knew you have put so much thoughts for this....and it really meant a lot to me.. and I hope that as I am turning 28.. I will cherish each minute, each second and love him more and more as day goes by....becoming the best partner as I could be.

Apart from the lovely cake and the fabulous gift, .... Mik, you are my best present on my birthday :) 

The Four Important Lessons

These are the four important lessons in my life now : 

1)  Past is past. Once the season is over, it will never return as time is unable to repeat itself.  Learn from it and move on. Never made mistakes from the past anymore

2)   Cherish all that you have now, especially people.
    Embrace them as you never did before…Treasure your family members, extended family, colleagues, existing friends, especially those you still have and those you neglect before, human around you… Treat them nicely and be kind, yet remain cautious on maintaining distance and private life.

3)  Love your partner.

Love as best as you can.

Love at all times, despite the circumstances

Love is about giving, not gaining, loyalty and commitment.

Love improves, and brings the best of your partner and yourself.

Giving thanks and cherish each second, each minute, each hour you have with your lover. 

Aim hard to achieve true love

4)   Most importantly…

God is the only source of all, all that I have come from Him alone.

You can’t buy peace from the world, let alone human…only Jesus can give real peace.

Who never makes mistake? None of us is righteous and we are sinners who need a Saviour..(Romans 3:23-24)… Indeed, through grace we are given mercy, forgiveness hope…

Thus, each day I strive in reminding myself that I need Him , each day I need strength to go on.. knowing that I am weak without Him.. and each day I commit, in prayer and faith...Sometimes I fall, sometimes I made mistakes.. but I know I have to stand up and never give up, knowing that He never leaves me nor forsake me.

In His promise, I stand.

Reflection

Scenes and acts change in drama opera and ballet, and so does our lives. 

10th June 2012 marked the significant change in my life, which was unpredictable, yet amiable. 

There are blissful moments, full of delights, ceaseless amusement that I am thankful of..

I believe that there are reasons behind all things. Nevertheless, some are exclusive... 

In spite of all,.. many lessons  have been learnt hoping that in the future..I would mature ..

One thing that I could not deny...that would be grace.

All that I have, all that I am.. I know surely it is permitted ...

Wouldn't I cherish it ? Wouldn't I be grateful ? 

Yes.. I do..

For all the time and moments that I have.. .

For all the parts to partake... in all seasons of lives....I want to give my best.. no matter how difficult or how hard it is.. I have fully committed for this...

May this journey be truly blessed.. may this journey change me to be a better woman, to be a better partner, to be faithful to the end...

Holding Hands - Steve Green

One day, far away, you gently won my heart
And one night, by candlelight, we made a vow to never part
And then it seemed just like a dream
When wide eyed, side by side
We faced the future holding hands

Years fly, they hurry by, the simple times are gone
Bills due, a kid or two, a week can feel eight days long
By fading light, let's kiss goodnight
And then we trace God's daily grace
Thankful we're still holding hands

There's a hope that won't let go
There's a truth we know
God is holding us
In His arms

Thoughts stray far away to all that lies ahead
In frail days when strength fades
Will we still mean all that we said?
Our love's secure, so rest assured
Come what may 'til that day
We'll walk forever holding hands

By God's grace 'til that day
We'll walk forever holding hands

(Love, Faith & Hope ~ True love never fails) 

The May State of Life

Many words inside, yet unable to truly convey them into sentences.. significantly.. personally..privately..it is a path with the bitter sweet, fragrant and aroma.. mise en place.. All that I am certain is that.. it is worth it.. No matter how vague it is now, there will be a day it would be crystal clear.. and I am waiting.. patiently. Each day passed by, the more assured I am..as it is the form of savoir-faire ..c'est mon la vie...I doubt not the moments with form of struggles and doubts.. yet, wouldn't it adds colours and sparks that no one else would comprehend ? Journey of life.. even unexpected gestures have made me simply.. smile .. I cherish each second ..yes, I do...

The Very Thought of You

The very thought of you and I forget to do
The little ordinary things that everyone ought to do
I'm living in a kind of daydream
I'm happy as a king
And foolish though it may seem
To me that's everything

The mere idea of you, the longing here for you
You'll never know how slow the moments go till I'm near you
I see your face in every flower
Your eyes in stars above
It's just the thought of you
The very thought of you, my love

By : Ray Noble (1934)

Tuhan Pasti Sanggup

Kuatkanlah hatimu
Lewati setiap persoalan
Tuhan Yesus slalu menopangmu
Jangan berhenti harap padaNya

Tuhan pasti sanggup
TanganNya takkan terlambat 'tuk mengangkatmu
Tuhan masih sanggup
Percayalah Dia tak tinggalkan mu
(Dia kan mengangkatmu)

Link : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Kq3BFRDl5I

Di saat kita merasa lemah, di saat kita tidak memiliki jalan keluar, Tuhan Yesus adalah tempat pengharapan. Sering kali situasi membuat kita merasa gagal, tetapi kutetap percaya, bahwa Tuhan akan membuka jalan dengan cara yang ajaib. Bahkan, segala hal yang terjadi diizinkan Bapa dengan maksud yang baik. Walau kadang kita tidak bisa berbuat apa-apa, biarlah kubawa semua doa kepada Dia, sebab Dia Bapa yang mendengar segala isi hati kita dan Dia sanggup. Kuatkanlah hatimu..

It has been 5 years long..

Compared to the last two years's old and new, this year was much more peaceful and I felt blessed. Gratitude was the words to depict, for having this momentum to countdown towards 2012 and to view the fireworks, accompanied by my sole closest friend that I had at that moment. Looking at the sky together, viewing the blasting colour of the fire, it was a very pleasant time, as we both were looking at the same sky, the same fire, at the exact similar location, 5 years ago, back in 2007.
For this another unexpected opportunity, I truly thank God.
Sometimes, certain friendships are hard to maintain.
The most precious ones need to pass through fires and pains, and the one that stands out the most and survive, is the most valuable, the most beautiful and the most precious. Sometimes, you might not know how to express it, sometimes your thanksgiving are kept only for yourself .For we would not know what friendship truly is, and might would not fully understand it. However, all the sharing, the keeping of gifts for years and all the thoughts, & time spent would prove on how much we value this. For sure, You wouldn't know how long it would last, and how long you are permitted by the Author of Life to maintain it.
Each second is precious, each moment is memorable. Will cherish this always.

2012 - The Year of God's Favour

Entering 2012, to have new faith for receiving His Favour.

For this new year, I pray and wish only one thing in my spiritual life : to be closer, to be deeper, to be more rooted, and to experience much more than before. 2011 had been a truly awesome year. I dare to testify that I was brought out of a miry clay, our of a darkness and He had really raise me up, giving me mercy and new spirit. The year of multiplication and promotion really happened. And by His grace, He had transformed me daily, sanctify me each time, and had written a beautiful 2011 for me. And most importantly, I give thanks for His huge trust in me, especially in my ministry in praise & worship.

I want 2012 to be the year where I soar with Him. To experience His presence that I never experience before, to worship in a way I never worship before, to go deeper, to pray more and to be bold in proclaiming His kingdom, to bless people around me especially through songs of praises, through music. I want to give my all, my best and to run this race only to please and to be His true worshiper. That's my goal, that's my heart, that's my prayer.

May He hear my heart, love me,strengthen me and walk with Me, until I have finished the missions and calls that He has prepared for me in 2012. By faith, I receive His favour.

好朋友的特殊烹饪

New Year's Eve lunch : 2011
我的好朋友的特殊烹饪特别棒. 萧友，好高兴，对我们的友情，我非常感恩。

Mon Anniversaire 2011

Being grateful for another year that I am entrusted to live with, indeed. Sincerely I could not be thankful enough for all that have happened. As for this year birthday, I would like to thank you as much as I could, for all the people in my lives, all the wishes, all the cares, all the gifts, and most importantly, the sincere hearts.

28th December 2011 noon, my Dondon ex colleagues; Alan, Mindy, Jay, Yong & Fiona had organized an awesome Korean dinner together and Cake time. Although we had been busy and hardly spent time with one another, reflecting back on how much they still care and loyal up to this day, I could not help it, but just smile whenever I remember them. Thank you all. Thank you also for Alan, Mindy & Jay for the lovely presents.

In a certain manner, honestly I missed the company that I had similar to the year before, but for 29th December 2011.. it was rare a solitary birthday. Perhaps suitable for me as it is amiably private moment for me. Pleasant indeed to indulge in my own world, ripping off the gifts with the love of mystery. Thank you and thank you for all of the gifts. I love each one of them, and all of them made brought happiness. And surprisingly, there are certain items that I have been always wanting to buy, yet, are given on my birthdays. Example : Bobbi Brown Eye Shadow (from Tika),2012 Diary (from my dear Liv) & Peter Alexander's clothes with Napoleon make up kit (from dear Syella). It must be Him, who knew what I need and put it in their hearts...Thank you Father.

And also, I will never forget my three companions, who have always been there. I love their gifts so much... It truly depicts who much they know me and understand who i really am. Thank you very much: Al, El & Ben. These are really, truly, marvelous. Also, thank you so much for Anastasya, who was the first giver of the year. I love that Paris box a lot. Missing her. Apart from that, thank you for Kristi, who celebrated my birthday on the 31st, thank you for your effort and the sharing that we shared. Thank You also for my FA members who celebrated my birthday on the 1st of January 2012. And as for all the wishes and greetings, may all of you be blessed !

Lastly, the dinner for this year birthday: a nonetheless moment that is as important, for it is a tradition for me to spend that hours with people who are essentially special and impertinent on my special day. And as for this year, it was a privilege to have my most loyal & closest friend to accompany me. It was simple , memorable & the loveliest dinner I have for my birthday throughout my life. One of a great gift that I really could never ever say thank you enough, is the long lasting quality times and friendship, that is extremely costly. With all of my heart : Merci Beaucoup.

As Time Goes By - A Tribute

When no one's around, when everyone's gone, the time you have with the only company left would be much valuable. These 3 consistent Saturdays have been pleasant, and worth to cherish, especially when you don't really have much chances throughout the year to have such quality times together. However, when you are permitted to spend time with, after such a long separation, it is beautiful.

Appreciate the endless generosity, the hours spent, all the wonderful meals, all the sharing and life experiences that I am entrusted with. All the ups and downs, all the goods and the ugly sides of life, to be able to know all... I would say, more than I deserve to know.. made me treasure this more. To think about it, this is the longest, lasting, friendship that I really have in Melbourne.. and I pray that it will last..I would never forget the time when you stand by me when no one else does, to offer me helps and company without complaining when no one else around.. Ceaseless gratitude... Words would not be able to describe how much this meant a lot to me. And since, I am limited and lacking in verbal expression, writing and prayers would be the only perfect channel of thoughts and emotions, the Lord knows best.

Christmas Eve, 24 December 2011, has been a memorable dinner, a wonderful Christmas present for me. We smiled, remembering that we had our first fine dining together in 31st December 2007, such a long time, but it just seems like yesterday. Amazing it is, to meet a person, similar to you, who has shared so much, with such a strong bond. I may or not know how do you view on this. But knowing myself how truth and precious this is for me, it is more than enough.

My only wish, is to ask for nothing for myself, but to have this friendship continues, as time goes by, to be able to witness how you beat the winds and conquer all the challenges, to be able to witness you grow more and more in Him, to be able to witness you to gain the best of the best, and to be able to see you happy and smile always.

BIC Choir 2011

Such an honor to minister together with these lovely people, who share the same passion, the same spirit and the same love towards our Father. We are not professionals, some of us have zero music background, we don't have a vocal teacher, but we have one thing in common : a heart to worship. Thinking back, it is indeed amazing, how we really had gone through song after song, a challenge after challenge, many busy practices and time spent in prayers. And thus, 2011 has been such a rewarding year. Of course, without Him, this ministry is just a mere performance of human works. It is only because of His grace that this choir exist. So we give all the glory unto the Lord alone. I believe that, we are still allowed to sing and serve, because His spirit is in all of us. And I know that this ministry will continue to be used to bring blessings and to proclaim the good news.

I am looking forward for 2012. Another grace, another year, to work and to give our best for this ministry. It would be great to meet the members again. Missing you all. God bless you.
Love, Jes.

It Had to be You

It had to be you, it had to be you
I wandered around, and finally found
The somebody who could make me be true
Could make me be blue or even be glad
Just to be sad just thinking of you
Some others I've seen might never be mean
Might never be cross or try to be boss
But they wouldn't do
For nobody else gave me the thrill
With all your faults
I love you still
It had to be you
It had to be you
It had to be you

Betty Hutton
"It Had To Be You" (1944)
From the Paramount Picture "Incendiary Blonde"
Written by Gus Kahn and Isham Jones
Orchestra conducted by Paul Weston
Released on Capitol 155

Link : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8h809JwAGB0&feature=related

Every Prayer

Every Prayer - Israel Houghton. feat. Mary Mary

I heard 'em say He brought me from a mighty long way
And now today I can testify that I believe it
And on my way I realized He's the one who kept me
When the storms of life arise, sleepless nights and desperate cries
He has captured every tear assuring me He hears

Every prayer, waiting on the answer only to discover He is near
And He hears every prayer for He has done great things
And I believe He's a God that always answers prayer

I heard 'em say the prayers of the righteous availeth much
And now today I can testify that I believe it
Now on my way I wanna let you know that He will keep you
When the storms of life arise, sleepless nights and desperate cries
He's captured every tear assuring me that He hears

Every prayer, waiting on the answer only to discover He is near
And He hears every prayer for He has done great things
I believe He's a God that always answers prayer

Don't despise the tears you've cried
Or the prayers that you have prayed
Heaven heard your every word
And the answer, the answer's on the way

I heard 'em say there is an answer on the way
My God has done so many great things, great things
Hold on and you will see there is an answer on the way
My God has done so many great things, great things

Oh, there is an answer on the way
My God has done so many great things, great things
Hold on, hold on, there is an answer on the way
My God has done so many great things, great things

Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on
You can make it, you can make it
You can make it for he has done great things

I believe He's a God that always
I believe He's a God that always
I believe He's a God who always answers prayers
Yes, He does

http://youtu.be/Kijc_5327yE

Quotes and Phrases from Brother Lawrence

Quotes to be remember from Brother Lawrence (1611 -1691):

• To that end I know the heart must be empty of all else, for God wishes to be its only processor without emptying it of all that is not Himself.
• It is not needful always to be in church to be with God. We can make a chapel of our heart, to which we can from time to time withdraw to have gentle, humble, loving communion with Him.
• I work before God simply in faith, with humility and with love, and I apply myself to do nothing, say nothing and think nothing, which can displease Him.
• Our sole business in this life is to please God.
• God seems to choose those who had been the greatest sinners to bestow upon them His greatest favours.
• I looked on Him in my heart as my Father and my God. I worshipped Him there as often as I could, holding my spirit in His holy presence, and recalling Him to mind as often as I found myself turned aside from Him.
• God very well knows what is our need, and all He does is for our benefit. If we knew how much He loves us, we should be every ready to receive equally at His hand the sweet and the bitter. Even the most painful things and the most hard would be sweet and pleasing to us.

Spiritual Principles:

To look always to God and His glory in all that we do, say and undertake; that the end we seek should be to become faultless worshippers of God in this life as we hope to be throughout eternity.

Practices Essential to Acquire the Spiritual Life

The most holy practice, the nearest to daily life, and the most essential for the spiritual life, is the practice of the presence of God.

To worship Him in Spirit And in Truth:

God is spirit and he must indeed be worshipped in truth – that is to say by a humble and genuine worship of the spirit in the depth and centre of our soul.

It is God alone who can see this worship, a worship we can so often repeat that the end it becomes as it were natural, as if God were one with our soul and our soul one with God. Practice makes this clear.

To worship God in truth is to recognise Him for what He is and to recognise ourselves for what we are.

Concerning the Presence of God

The presence of God is a directing of our spirit to God or a present remembrance of God which can come about either through the imagination or the understanding.

Means of Attaining the Presence of God: a great purity of life & a great faithfulness in the practice of this presence.

Bibliography:

"The Practice of the Presence of God", Brother Lawrence, translated by E.M. Blaiklock, foreword by Jennifer Rees Larcombe, Hodder & Stoughton Ltd, London 1981.

Sharing from Workplace

My current occupation as a customer service coordinator..

I have been working for almost 9 months. Do I like it ? not really. But i live with it, without a choice.
I got this job: by grace. (Dec 2010)
I never ever even thought about applying for customer service job.(In fact, I didn't apply. A kind hearted manager approached me in church and I was given this job).

Some background, Before and After:

Honestly I admitted that I did and maybe do, or do, have problems with people and temper.
I prefered a quiet environment of work, where I did not have to speak to strangers everyday, with no disruption when I am doing work. Another thing is, I am so used to solitary and I love it. Being alone doing work, had been my life for years.

My academic life requires me to spend a lot of time alone. I could shut myself in a library reading and practicing for whole day, without talking to a single soul. I was a student, who preferred to eat alone so that I could spend time studying. I was friendless even in few uni subjects, without an inkling of the need of a company.

These moulded my characters to be a perfectionist, a loner and an independent individual. Followed by this, ended up working in a hectic place where I committed, I strived, climbed to the top, became on of the best. Yet, my temper was built up lot there, being impatient, being easily angered or "manipulation" of stuff were a daily norm of behaviour that did not only acceptted as tolerable, but sometimes are required.

Then after I quit the company, I was jobless for 8 months, depressed due to personal problem, and desperate for a job in 2010..

22th December 2010, I was accepted in the current place.

Initially, it was a really hard place to work due to the huge differences in the environment in comparison to my uni and previous work situation. Like it or not, I need to talk, forced to accept complaints and learned to be patient.

I sort of asking for mercy.. begging and telling myself that : One day, you have to get out from this place.
And the more I cried out, the more I struggled...and the more depressed I become at work. Sanctification and denying the true you is extremely hard.

mid April 2011...
Finally, I started to realise that, I have to pray for the work place. Then I took a day in a week to start praying for the place. May the Lord bless this place, that's the main point, bless the souls, save the souls. And change myself, for I realise that my being here ... have to be the light of the place..
It doesn't have to be a long prayer.. but I believe that, when we do it, faithfully, God works.

As for me, I was undergoing a hard changes. I realise that God put me here for a training. To learn to talk. To learn to rejoice, to learn to smile and care and BE HUMBLE. Scolded and being complained sometimes, but what else I could do, then just keep my mouth zipped..It is hard, but whenever I started to let my nature to have the stage, " No " and " SHut Up" are the frequent terms, bombarding my heart.

Gradually

The more we obey, the more we realise, it is He taking over us.
To be honest, the job is still very boring and dry (honestly), but I live with it. Believing that one day I still could go out for the place.But not now.

Sometimes, I received gifts from customers ( clothes, books, foods that I never expect and I did not deserve these. And I wonder, why did these people buy me stuff ? They do touch my heart..and will be remembered.

I myself still have struggles with my flesh, with all the weaknesses I have and yes, I do need His strength to be patient daily, to care, to at least be nice to customer, and to remember HIm. Daily prayer before work is important. I humbly encourage you all to give 5 mins prayer before you work or class or exam or etc.

Epilogue

Remember Joseph ? Who was sent to Potiphar's house and the place was bless ? I believe that when His presence is in us, He controls the place. No one could harm you unless He permits. And the place would have a different atmosphere.

Sometimes, God led us to a place or a situation, where we complainted a lot. Yet, in the end, we never know that, He is planning of something and His plan would never be as what we thought.

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11)